Yep. Ken Bruen has won a Shamus award for Best Hardcover. Could things get any better here at Murderati? I don’t think so . . .

Sorry for the intrusion on Dave’s wonderful post, but . . .
Congrats to Simon Wood on his Anthony Award for best Short Story! And congrats to Alex for her nom for best first novel. 

Hey, congrats to every single nominee! What a wonderful awards ceremony last night must have been. 
Cheers, Pari

(I was going to interview Guyot on his own TV career (or better yet, have him interview himself) to round out this series on television writing, but it just so happened that a pro did this very inclusive interview this week. So much the better! – Alex, returning next week)

The following is an interview with Paul Guyot, conducted by Patti McCoy-Jacob, book critic for the Yorba Linda Star newspaper, and http://isurfoc.com. The interview took place on September 13th, 2007, at the Island Hotel in Newport Beach, California.

I met Paul Guyot on a bright afternoon at Fashion Island in Newport Beach, California. He was dressed casually chic, and had an immediate affability about him. Though self-deprecating at times, one can tell he’s loves his work. He has a passion for the written word, and his eyes light up when he talks about the craft, and his admiration for those that do it well.

PMJ: What made you decide that writing was the way you wanted to make your living? Was it a decision that came gradually over time, or did you have some sort of epiphanic moment?

PG: I’ve been writing since Mrs. Parker’s 3rd grade class. How old is a third grader? I wrote parodies initially, then moved on to westerns in Mrs. Shattenberg’s 5th grade class, and finally to crime fiction in 8th grade. I can’t remember my eighth grade teacher’s name, but she kicked me out of class. Out of school, actually.

PMJ: Why do you prefer writing crime fiction over other genres?

PG: I think the mystery/crime story offers a built-in spine that’s attractive to me. A crime’s committed, there’s an investigation, and a resolution – good or bad. It’s clean. That’s my writerly answer. My personal answer is I have a very nasty, very dark side. I’ve walked a lot of places I never should have been. Writing about crimes keeps me from committing them.

PMJ: I assume your favorite television shows consist of cop or crime series?

PG: It’s certainly my favorite genre, but I’m a huge fan of THE OFFICE, and TWO AND A HALF MEN. For drama, I think hands down the single best thing on television is THE WIRE. Nothing else comes close. Season three of that show might have been the best single season of any television series in history.

PMJ: What are the major differences when you write for television as opposed to the printed page?

PG: Well, I have very little experience with prose, let’s make that clear. I’m a TV writer by trade, and have done that for years, my published prose is limited to several short stories, which have been published in anthologies, or original fiction web sites. I’ve had good response – a story I wrote for Bryon Quertermous’ outstanding Demolition site was chosen as a notable short story in 2006.

PMJ: Do you have plans to ever tackle a novel?

(Guyot grins) PG: The one question I was hoping you wouldn’t ask. Yes, yes, yes, I, like every other poor slob in this country, am working on a novel. I was scheduled to be done the second week in August, but my day job got in the way, as it always seems to do. But I think, after years of toying with the idea, I’m actually executing it now. I’m past the 55,000 word mark, and it’s still holding up. My goal is to get those last thirty or so thousand words down by Thanksgiving. (Laughs) God, I know as soon as Battles and Browne read this, I’m dead.

PMJ: Battles and Browne?

PG: A couple of writer friends – Brett Battles and Robert Gregory Browne – both published authors, who have been on me like corrosion on Britney to finish the freaking thing. I started back in January, just before we all got met at a writing conference in Seattle, and I made the mistake of opening my mouth about it.

PMJ: Speaking of which, do you have a favorite U.S. city?

PG: Chicago, despite the fact Sean Chercover lives there. Sorry, another writer name I’m dropping. I’ll stop. I love Chicago. It’s beautiful, and dangerous, and has amazing food, great architecture, good sports teams, and the people there are – in my experience – the nicest, most genuine people in the country. They’re like Canadians with poorer table manners.

PMJ: Are you working on any television series right now?

PG: I am. I recently sold a pilot to A&E network. It’s a cop show, big surprise, set in St. Louis, another shocker. It deals with the themes of idealism versus pragmatism in our country today. The whole red state-blue state thing, does idealism even exist anymore, all done inside the world of a cop show.

PMJ: Sounds intriguing.

PG: I’m really excited about it. Peter Horton’s directing. He did the pilot to Grey’s Anatomy and a bunch of other stuff. He’s great. He and I actually came up with the story together. And he loves the idea of it being in St. Louis. We haven’t seen a cop show set there, and there are a lot of crime stories we can tell that wouldn’t be part of a cop show set in New York or LA.

PMJ: Now, you live in St. Louis, right? Did you place the show there because of the familiarity?

PG: It’s funny, in the last four years I’ve written four pilots – all set in St. Louis. The first two pilots got made, meaning they were actually filmed, but I was forced to rewrite them – to change the location.

PMJ: Why?

(Guyot pauses before answering) PG: Well, the first one was because the Missouri Film Commission dropped the ball – I had a studio willing to go to St. Louis, but the film office was, let’s just say, not paying attention. And the second one was rewritten for New York because of an idiot producer – who had more juice than I did – was on the project. He lived in New York, and literally didn’t want to travel anywhere to shoot the pilot. Changing it from St. Louis to New York was like changing The Sopranos from Jersey to Bakersfield – it’s just not gonna be the same show.

But when I write, I don’t set things in StL simply because I know the place, but rather because I love it. I love the town, and think it works on many levels as a setting for stories. But just as Connelly will reveal the ugliness of his beloved LA – and the Bosch novels are love letters to LA – I will show elements of the Arch City that wouldn’t make the Chamber of Commerce brochure.

PMJ: Are all your short stories set in St. Louis?

PG: No. My story in GREATEST HITS (Carroll & Graf, 2005) was mostly set in Scottsdale, Arizona, where I grew up. I did that for my parents, since it was my first published work. And my story for HOLLYWOOD & CRIME (Pegasus, 2007) had to be set in Hollywood for obvious reasons. But the next one I have coming out is definitely set in St. Louis.

PMJ: Out of all of your produced work, both in TV and print, is there any single one that stands out as your all-time favorite, and if so, why?

PG: A story I like quite a bit won’t be out until next spring. I have a short story in the upcoming MWA (Mystery Writers of America) anthology BURDEN OF THE BADGE. It’s edited by Michael Connelly, and the story was chosen from a hundred or so blind submissions and it’s the first prose work that I don’t wince at.

As for screenwriting, I wrote a JUDGING AMY episode that, not only was hardly rewritten at all – a rarity in TV – but it went on to win an award. That felt pretty good. The single thing I’m most proud of is a pilot I wrote for Sony last year called I.D. It’s about a cop deep, deep undercover inside a criminal organization, and the hook is that for the first season the audience isn’t told who the cop is – they have to guess. I really loved the concept and the script came out great.

Unfortunately, due to a myriad of reasons involving politics and paranoia, the script was never really shown to any of the networks. But I get the rights back in fourteen months and I’m going to make it myself. But I must admit, my greatest moment as a writer was when I learned that entry in the Bulwer-Lytton fiction writing contest – for the worst opening lines you can think up – not only won honorable mention, but was chosen to be included in the contest’s newest anthology, IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT.

PMJ: Do your have any type of trademark in your stories? Something that people would expect to come across when reading a story by Paul Guyot?

PG: My trademark, or signature, is very mediocre writing. If you read a story, and at the end go, “Eh,” that was probably a Paul Guyot tale.

PMJ: I doubt that. If you had to choose, what would give you greater satisfaction – writing a pilot that makes it onto the air and becomes a series, or writing a number one best-seller?

PG: No contest, writing the book. I recently told a friend – in all honesty – that I would rather make fifty grand a year writing books than make three hundred and fifty grand doing television. I know that statement rubs people the wrong way, but it’s usually those who haven’t ever made that kind of money. I’ve seen both sides of it – I’ve made tons of dough, and I lived off of Top Raman – and I now know the cliché is true: money doesn’t buy happiness. You can rent it for a while, but in the end, we’re all playing with the House’s money.

PMJ: Who are your favorite authors, and why?

PG: I can’t say enough about James Lee Burke. Knocks me on my ass every time. Updike, Pelecanos, Lippman, Eisler (though I hate him for his hair), Lehane, Coetzee. For the screen, Chase and David Simon always blow me away. When I go old school it’s with John D., Chandler, O’Conner, Cain. Names not quite as well known (yet) that impress me are Dave White, Duane Swierczynski, Alex Sokoloff – a recovering screenwriter – and a guy named Phil Hawley.

PMJ: Do you try to pattern your style of writing after any of these favorites, and if so, which one(s) and why?

PG: I’ve made that mistake before. I think most newer writers – who are still searching for their voice, or simply lack confidence as I did – do this at some point. The writing will always suck when you’re attempting to emulate someone (consciously or unconsciously), but I think it’s a good exercise in a way, because writing anything – even pure garbage – is better than not writing.

PMJ: Do you subtly or overtly incorporate into your stories people you know personally? Has anyone ever recognized themselves?

PG: I’ve never put someone I know down on paper. I may use a real person as inspiration, or take aspects of their behaviors or attitudes, because I like creating my own characters. As for using real people’s names – I love doing that. In the HOLLYWOOD & CRIME anthology, I have a story called Barry of Hollywood. It’s a goofy little PI romp and I think every character other than the lead is named after a friend of mine, or someone I know.

One of the more unlikable characters carries the name of an idiot producer I once worked with. Then there are several writer friends whose names make appearances. One funny thing – I gave a character the name Swierczynski, after Duane – but changed it when I got grief from the editor, not because it was unpronounceable, but because it was TOO obvious I was using a famous author’s name.

PMJ: I can tell you enjoy your work. What’s your favorite part of the actual writing process?

PG: Yeah, I love writing. I roll my eyes whenever I hear writers talk about how they hate to write, or how they wish they could do something else. Please. They say that because it’s good copy, and it sounds like they’re really busting their ass as opposed to sitting around day making up stories. Yes, writing can hard, excruciatingly difficult at times, especially during deadlines. But any write who says they hate it is full of shit. Writing is possibly the greatest job one can have.

It’s what we did as kids – make believe. And that’s my favorite part, to get to your question. The creation of the characters is what I love. I like telling stories, but I get the most pleasure when I have a guy walk into a room and there’s three people in the room. Who are they? What do they look like? Where are they from? Why are they there? Not only do I get to give them ticks, and weird features and behavior, but I get to decide why they’re there, what they want. I get to play God – I create people. I love that part.

PMJ: You mentioned authors you admire, or who may influenced you, is there anyone you’ve known personally that has had the greatest influence on your writing, and in what way?

PG: I owe Michael Connelly a huge debt of gratitude. It’s been mentioned before so I won’t bore you with it, but he was basically the first writer to ever tell me – you can do this. He also exposed me to Mystery Writers of America – a great organization – and the entire crime writing community. As a screenwriter, JJ Abrams and the Hall sisters (Barbara and Karen), who wrote and produced JUDGING AMY, are others who taught me a lot, personally and professionally.

PMJ: When you are working on a story, do you aim to write a certain amount of words per day or to write for a certain amount of hours per day?

PG: For me, I am at my most productive, and creative best, when I am on a strict schedule. Not so much a word count as a time count. I start at the same time every day, and write until the same time, or until I’ve accomplished enough, either number of words, or development of story.

PMJ: Do you have a set writing schedule during the week, or is each day different depending on the circumstances for that particular day?

PG: I try to write five days a week. Weekends are for family, and I only work if I’m on deadline. As I said, I always try to start my workdays at the same time, and go for the same number of hours. I’ve tried the “just work whenever it comes” method, but that disastrous. See, I lack discipline. This year has been one of the most, if not thee, most productive year of my career, from a word count standpoint. And I attribute that to a solid schedule. Basically since the spring, I have been waking up, going to the gym immediately – I highly recommend working out for writers, we’re all such sloths by vocation – then turning on my computer in the same spot, by the same time, usually nine, every morning. And I write until four.

PMJ: All right, last question, then you can go…

PG: Are you kidding? It’s gorgeous here, I’m never leaving. Even after the interview, I’m just going to sit here. Newport is definitely a place I could write. No wonder Jeff Parker does such good work – doesn’t he write around here?

PMJ: Out of everything you’ve learned about writing over the years, is there any one best piece of advice you could give to others who are serious about improving their writing?

PG: Aw, crap, I hate this question. It’s a subjective subject and subjective answer. I can rant and rant about this. There are so many people that think simply getting a book deal, or a script sold means they are a good writer. It doesn’t. I can’t tell you how many bad writers there are out there making a living. But hey, it’s subjective, like I said. Some people, maybe a lot of people, might think I completely suck. And I’m making a living.

But for me, I can tell within five minutes of meeting a writer whether or not they truly know anything about the craft. It’s painfully obvious when they open their mouths and start spewing their expertise that they are simply a victim (or beneficiary) of timing, and that’s how they got published or got a film or pilot made.

If I really had to give advice – pity the person coming to me for advice on anything – I would say that, for newer writers, folks who think they might want to give writing a try, because it seems like a cool way to make a living, don’t. Because you’ll suck. For newer writers who have a gut-churning desire to write, to tell stories, but feel they don’t know how to go about it, just do it. Start writing anything. Grocery lists, list all the people you want to get even with, list all the Jackson Browne songs that sound the same, write anything. Just write. And read. Reading and writing are the two best teachers in the world.

My advice for those who have already a novel or a screenplay, and are wanting to know how to get an agent, or get published, or get their opus into the hands of Steven Soderbergh, is keep writing. Chances are great that your manuscript or screenplay isn’t nearly as good as you think it is. I always laugh when I meet someone who says they have a screenplay or novel and they’ve done one rewrite on it, or sometimes none! And they think it’s gold. I’m sitting there going, “Okay, people like Cormac McCarthy and JM Coetzee, and Steve Zaillian rewrite the shit out of their stuff, but yours can’t be improved. Uh, huh.” Learn to rewrite. I’m not saying never let go of something, not at all, I’m saying, just as you’re never as bad as you think you are, you are certainly NEVER as good as you think are.

PMJ: Paul, thank you so much, this has been fun.

PG: Thank you.

Paul Guyot wrote and produced the CBS drama JUDGING AMY for three years. Before that he wrote for shows such as FELCITY and LEVEL 9. He has written pilots for Sony Pictures, Warner Brothers, Fox, TNT, Lion’s Gate, and A&E.

by Pari Noskin Taichert

A man, estranged from his wife, attacks her when she comes to pick up their kids from his house. The mother strives to remain calm, even after being stabbed with a box cutter, so that her four young children won’t be traumatized.

Her one son tries to stop his dad and gets shoved against a wall. Her oldest daughter — 10 years — tries to call the police and her father knocks the phone out of her hand. He drags their mother, bleeding and still trying to make sure her children are all right, into the back of her own pick up truck.

The daughter, taking charge of her siblings, runs to a neighbor’s home and calls 9-1-1. By the time law enforcement arrives, the man and woman are gone.

The next day, the man walks out of the wilderness and stops at the first house he finds. He’s dirty and covered in blood. He asks for water and a telephone.

The woman’s blackened body is found later that day in her charred skeleton of a car.

The justice system being what it is, the man who has been offered a deal refuses it. He pleads not guilty to her murder in spite of the fact that his own children witnessed the attack and the body has been found.

Moving stuff, hunh? It’d make a great story . . .

Well, it’s the true tale of Nova Bjorn Ochoa Delgado’s last hours of life. She was murdered near Farmington, New Mexico this summer.

Here’s the thing: I know I could write this as a true crime; the family would most likely give me permission. It’d probably sell well, too. I’m great at nonfiction AND Toni (see yesterday’s post here on Murderati) is right about many audiences wanting more gore.

I could make good money off of it . . .

I just don’t want to.

The whole thing is too horrid for me. I can’t get past the mother desperately trying to keep her cool so that her children wouldn’t have even worse memories. I can’t fathom what scars these kids will deal with for the rest of their lives. I cannot, for one minute, understand a man who’d do something like this. Frankly, I don’t want to spend any time near his mind.

This past weekend, our Tae Kwon Do community held a benefit for Delgado’s children. She was a student at our sister do jang in Farmington. We had to do something to show our support for those kids, for her siblings and family. We had to find a way to quell some of our own horror.

I met her oldest daughter and her parents. The reality was just a handshake away.

Watching the aftermath of this tragedy unfold, I realized I do have limits. There are things I simply will not write about.

What about you, Murderati readers and writers?
Do you have taboo subjects, ones that are just too close or too horrible to pen or read?

by Mike MacLean

Hammering out the screenplay, I got to thinking about some of my favorite action movies.  Lucky for me, somebody from Entertainment Weekly was on my wavelength.

A couple weeks ago, the magazine listed their picks for the 25 greatest, ass-kick-iest flicks of all time.  And God knows how I do love the lists.

For the most part, EW did a good job.  See if you agree. 

1. Die Hard 
Hard to argue with this pick.  Even harder to imagine any one else playing John McClane other than Bruce Willis who, rumor has it, was the studio’s 5th choice.  Lots of movies have cool gunfights and theater rocking explosions, but only Die Hard had Willis matching wits with ultra cool baddie Alan Rickman.  Those two guys made the movie.
2. Aliens
3. Raiders of the Lost Ark
4. The Road Warrior
"Greetings from The Humungus! The Lord Humungus! The Warrior of the Wasteland! The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla!"
5. The Matrix
6. Seven Samurai
7. Gladiator
I really enjoyed the Gladiator’s scope and spectacle.  But was it better than Mel Gibson’s Brave Heart, which Entertainment Weekly totally snubbed?  (They didn’t even put it in the top 50)
8. Saving Private Ryan
9. Hard-Boiled
I would’ve thrown John Woo’s the Killer in the top 25 as well.  Mr. Woo knows how to pour on the bullets. 10. Terminator 2: Judgment Day
11. Speed
12. The Empire Strikes Back
Only one thing could’ve made this movie better: More Boba!
13. The Wild Bunch
Only one thing could’ve made this movie better: More cowbell!
14. RoboCop
Who is that playing Robocop’s badass nemesis?  Why it’s Red Forman from that 70s show, "Dumb ass!"
15. Enter the Dragon
"Boards don’t hit back."
16. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
17. The Bourne Supremacy
I enjoyed The Bourne Supremacy, but I really dug The Bourne Identity, directed by Doug Liman.  This guy knows how to put action on the screen.  Don’t believe me?  Just check out the brutal fight scene between Damon and the scooter-driving, Italian hit man.  Yes, I said "scooter-driving hit man."
18. The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938)
19. Goldfinger
Come on, everyone knows Moonraker is the best Bond film of all time.  (Dear God, I hope they realize I’m kidding,)
20. Kill Bill-Vol. 1
If you’re keeping score—The Bride: 88.  The Crazy Eighty-eights: Zip
21. Spider-Man 2 
By far the best of the three and a great movie, yet something always bothered me about it.  There is a scene where Spidey and Doctor Octopus fall from a building, trading punches on the way down.  There’s one problem with this scenario.  Spidey has superhuman strength; he can lift 10 tons in fact.  So, one good haymaker to Doc’s chin would’ve turned his head to a pulpy mush.  (Jesus, I didn’t realize how nerdy this sounded until it poured out on the screen.)           
22. Predator
"I ain’t got time to bleed."
23. Drunken Master II
24. Lethal Weapon
25. The Incredibles

On their website, Entertainment Weekly listed their picks for numbers 26-50 as well.  I do have some quibbles. 

Movies EW snubbed…

The Professional (It made number 26 on the list.  Me?  I could think of at least four or five from the top 25 that I would replace with ole Leon.) 
Braveheart
Heat (For the bank robbery scene alone it should be on the list)
All of the Lord of the Rings films
And the first Conan film (written by none other than Oliver Stone, betcha didn’t know that)

So how about it Murder fans?  Did Entertainment Weekly do the genre justice?  Where did they drop the ball?

by Robert Gregory Browne

I was talking to a friend recently who loves language, writes
poetry and short stories and wants very much to be a novelist. She has,
in fact, started a novel, but somewhere around the middle point she
ground to a halt.

“I’m stuck,” she told me.

Welcome to the wonderful world of writing, I almost said. Instead, I
gave her the advice that I’ve often heard attributed to Raymond
Chandler:

When you’re stuck, bring in a man with a gun.

Now, since Chandler wrote mysteries featuring private eye Philip Marlowe (the most brilliant of which is The Long Goodbye),
he was probably literally suggesting that you bring in a man with a
gun. But Chandler was a smart guy and an incredible talent, so I have a
feeling he also meant much more than that.

Your Man with a Gun doesn’t necessarily have to be armed
and dangerous. If we think figuratively, he can be anything, from a
plot point to a sudden change in weather. The point is to bring in some
new element — possibly from left field — something unexpected that gets
the story rolling again and, more importantly, gets your creative
juices flowing.

Several months ago, as I was working on my new book, I found I’d gotten stuck as well, and was desperately searching for my own Man
with a Gun. It took me awhile to remember a particular plot point that
I had thought up before I even started writing the book, but once I
did, the story once again blossomed and I was on the move.

The notes for my own Man with a Gun read something like this: 

• Bag of clothes
• Meeting of Brass
• Blackburn reassigned
• Carrots

Now, I know, none of these sound even remotely like a man with a gun
but, trust me, for the purposes of my story they were. These four things collectively created a plot point that propelled me forward,
probably for a good thirty pages or so.

THE WHAMMY CHART

In Hollywood, there’s a producer named Larry Gordon who supposedly
created (and I have no real verification of this) what’s known as a
Whammy Chart.

The idea of a Whammy Chart is that about every ten
minutes or so in an action movie, you need a Whammy event. Something
big happening that shifts the story and keeps the audience
interested. It could be an action beat, a sex beat, a relationship beat
— whatever. Just something that kicks up the stakes and keeps things
moving.

Some laugh at the Whammy Chart, calling it ridiculously formulaic — and they’re probably right.  But in terms of keeping things moving — at least in the plotting stages — I think it’s a pretty good idea.

Of course, in novels, those ten minutes would likely translate to forty or fifty pages, but you get the drift.  And we’re just talking ballpark.

Every novel, every story is
different, but I think it’s important to continually keep things
hopping, moving forward, progressing toward the hero’s goal. Give your
readers unexpected twists.

Or you may want to finally fulfill a
promise you’ve made in your earlier pages and give them an event
they’ve been anticipating or dreading, like the death of a character or
that first kiss in a budding relationship.

The real beauty of the Man with a Gun/Whammy Chart idea is that it helps
you keep from getting stuck. Even if you don’t specifically plot out
what those Whammy events are, when you do get stuck, you know it’s time for one.

It certainly works for me.

Raymond Chandler and Larry Gordon.  Very smart guys. 

But there are a lot of smart people here on Murderati, as well.  What do you do when you’re hopelessly stuck?

This just in to the Murderati grapevine…

Our very own Ken Bruen will be presented with the first ever David L. Goodis Award at NoirCon in Philadelphia, PA. The conference, slated for April 3-6, 2008, follows in the footsteps of last year’s GoodisCon, with plans for an annual celebration of the past, present and future of Noir in all its forms.

Congratulations, Ken! A well-deserved honor indeed!

By Mike MacLean

Sundays are typically slow for the Poisoned Pen bookstore. But not when Bestselling thriller writer Barry Eisler is in town.

Promoting his newest novel Requiem for an Assassin, Eisler spoke to a pretty good-sized crowd, all of us John Rain fans. I’ve been to two appearances by Mr. E, and neither time did he disappoint. Eisler speaks with wit and enthusiasm, and as much as any author I’ve met, he seems truly happy to meet and greet his fans.

According to Eisler…

His next novel will be a stand-alone thriller.

He might someday write a Rain prequel, where the origin of Rain’s code of conduct is revealed.

He has considered writing novels centering on other characters from the John Rain world… Dox the former Marine sniper and Delilah the sexy Mossad operative.

Everyone from Ken Watanabe to Keanu Reeves has been mentioned to play the role of Rain on the big screen. Eisler kind of warmed to the idea of John Cusack.

Along with hearing a tallented writer speak, I got a first-hand lesson in missed opportunaties.

While waiting in line to get Requiem signed, a buddy of mine ambled over with a copy of The Deadly Bride in one hand and a pen in the other. He wanted me to sign my story. I, of course, replied, “Oh man, don’t do this to me.”

Now, I could lie. I could say I didn’t want to John Hancock the book because it would appear hackish, like I was gloming off a best seller’s signing to promote my own work. But the truth is, a few people in line were watching us, and I felt embarresed.

I never liked being the center of attention. Among friends, drinking a few beers, I can tell stories with the best of them. But those are friends. The people watching us at the Poisoned Pen were strangers.

On the drive home, I realized I’d missed an opportunity. If I had signed my friend’s copy of The Deadly Bride maybe one of the people in line would’ve been curious enough to ask about it. Maybe they would’ve bought a copy. Maybe they would’ve told their friends about it. And their friends would check out my website, then check out Murderati. Then they’d buy Pari’s book, or Alex’s or…

It could happen.

I’m a good writer; I don’t feel arogant saying that. But there are tons of good writers out there. If I’m at a convention cocktail party, how’s my writing going to grab the attention of the agent, the editor, the movie producer?

I’m lightyears away from worying about public appearances. But if I really want to cut out a space for myself in this industy, I know I’ve got to start embracing my inner extrovert. The question is, how?

Thanks again to Barry Eisler for a nice afternoon at the bookshop, and a great read to take home.

by Robert Gregory Browne

This isn’t the post you were originally meant to read.

Until last night, I had planned to release an allegory of sorts, a short story about two painters hawking their wares at an arts festival, a thinly disguised version of events that unfolded at a recent group signing I was involved in.

I decided to scrap it.  Why?  Because — as my wife rightly pointed out — it was too mean spirited and not nearly as clever as I originally thought it was.  And in my attempt to take a fellow author to task, I lost sight of the point of the post.

So that post is now gone. 

The incident that sparked it, however, is still fresh in my mind and several weeks later, the feelings that this incident stirred up don’t seem to want to go away.

So let’s talk about those feelings.

While I’ll never be one to call what we writers do "art," I certainly take pride in the work I put into a book.  It took me years to learn my craft, years to learn to paint pictures with words, to create three-dimensional characters, to keep a story moving forward through dialog and action and unexpected plot twists.

I don’t think I have to say that writing a book is not an easy thing to do, and those of us who manage and, better yet, manage to get it published,  have every right to cherish that accomplishment.

Once we do get published, however, a whole new set of realities enter our world, not the least of which is the task of promoting our books.

But the question I have to ask myself (especially after an encounter with an author whose take-no-prisoners enthusiasm for the task was annoying, to say the least) is:  what exactly are we selling?

Is the work we do, the product we represent, no different than link sausage or high-heeled shoes?  Are we in the same type of business as carnival barkers or medicine wagon hucksters?  Should we stand on a crowded street corner, megaphone in hand, and call potential readers over to sample our wares?

I don’t think so. 

Call me a snob, but I like to think that what we do is special.  And rare.  And when it comes to promoting my books, I try to do it with a kind of dignity that reflects that.   In a group promotional situation, I also try to treat those around me, my fellow authors, with the same kind of dignity and not allow my words and/or actions to make them feel uncomfortable or embarrassed. 

It’s simple courtesy.

Unfortunately, not all of us feel this way.  Some of us feel quite comfortable with that megaphone pressed against our lips, and selling our work is no different than selling a bottle of snake oil. For whatever reason — and who knows, it may be a good one — these authors feel compelled to grab every potential customer by the lapels and drag him or her over for a closer look at their "product."

But I’m just not built that way.   And maybe that’s a problem.  Maybe I need to wake up to the realities of the book business and realize that because we live in a world of short attention spans, a place filled with a lot of glittery objects, that I need to do whatever I can to get people to pay attention to mine.

A few weeks ago, I posted a forum topic over at Crimespace called BSP about my disdain for blatant self-promotion.  It turned out that my post touched such a nerve that I got dozens of comments and even won a Crimespace t-shirt after it was voted "topic of the month."

Several of the comments took me to task, telling me that promotion is a necessary part of the game.  But these people misunderstood what I was trying to say.  I have no problem with promotion.  I’ll gladly play that game as long as it’s necessary.

But where I draw the line is when that promotion crosses over into "blatant" territory, where everything we say and do is designed to push our product, where every encounter we have on an online forum or blog or in a chatroom is an opportunity to sell, sell, sell.

I believe in the soft sell.  And while I’m happy to do book tours and attend conventions and festivals and mingle with those who love to read, I’ll be damned if I’ll shove my book under everyone’s nose and beg them to read it.

Most of my selling is done on the page. And while I may be naive, I believe that good writing will eventually attract a following and that word of mouth is the very best selling tool we have.

I don’t want to be seen as a crass used car salesman.  I can’t imagine that anyone does.

So if you ever see me on a promotional tour, don’t be surprised if I keep it low key.  I’ll give my speech, sign my books, talk to you about reading or writing or whatever you feel like talking about.

But, please, don’t ever expect me to pick up that megaphone.